Tag Archives: self-medicating

self sabotage


my life

whyy do i keep doing this to myself

now i have 2 hours to do all this research and then write 7 pages.



and to make it even worse: the bearsĀ game was super depressing today and I’ve had a migraine since 2

hopefully this blunt will help

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Zombie wine

I don’t know why, but wine always seems to clear my mind.
I wonder if the world knows that hallucinations aren’t limited to schizophrenia and drug abuse.. ..

Sometimes shit just happens.
Sometimes sleep is not an option
Sometimes your body retaliates in a really fucked up manner

But I refuse to give up on myself


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Changed my mind.
Not ready to start therapy again. Not yet anyway.

But i also can’t keep self medicating like I’ve been doing….


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as the waves were high…

all that you love
will be carried away

i jinxed myself by thinking i had my bipolar under control
and by saying i had my mania under control

i should’ve known better than that

i’m stuck in this rut
so I’m self-medicating to ease the pain
every second
of everyday

but theres more to the picture than meets the eye

i slept most of the day yesterday
in doing so, i had a series of elaborate dreams

woke up thinking they were real
picked up my phone to make a call and remembered they weren’t real
remembered I’m not happy
remembered i’m losing my fucking mind
remembered I’m barely managing to get through the day

remembered that just a week ago i was fine
remembered that everything just fell apart

what am i doing?
why can’t i just be ok?

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