Tag Archives: feelings

i care so much it hurts

im not the jealous type
but all of a sudden i feel envy creeping into my mind
im terrified of falling
of all that lovey-dovey bullshit

the more i fight it, the more you stay on my mind
why cant i just turn it off
make myself numb
stop caring
or at least stop these feelings
fuck these feelings
i hate these feelings
cuz i cant shake these feelings
im used to being numb
numb was the safest thing
who cares if i wasn’t happy? at least i wasn’t sad. at least my heart wasn’t torn to shreds…cuz honestly i’ve had quuuuiiiiiittttteeee enough of that.
numbness was my protection
so how the fuck did i let this happen
how could i let you in, past all my defenses, past all my walls
how could i let you close enough to steal my heart
and fly away with it
leaving me here.
on my own again…
alone again…
as i continued to fall
and fall and

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you did this

i tried to write you a letter
to tell you how i feel
tell you of the butterflies in my stomach
of the way i squeal when i see a letter from you in the mail
of the hollow space in my heart when you’re away
of the countless times that i think of you every single day
i tried to write you a letter…
but i couldn’t find the words to tell you
what words could never explain

you know that feeling you get
on a roller-coaster
as you’re flipped upside down
before a drop so steep and fast you feel as though you’re about to hit the ground
defying gravity as you’re whisked right back up high in the air

stomach in knots
pulse racing
heart skipping a couple beats
that adrenaline rush
is only a fraction
of these feelings i’ve got

you make me feel alive again
you make all good things better
you spark a light that shines in me
and i know that sounds so damn cliché,
but oh well,
who cares,

when it comes to you i dont know what it is that comes over me
i trip over my words
like im dancing with 2 left feet
i dont care what people think
i dont give a damn what they say
i dont give 2 shits if im vulnerable
because you’re worth any risk that i could take

i tried to write you a letter…
but words still could not describe
the feelings that i have for you
these feelings hiding inside
all i know is when i think of you
my smile is so much brighter
so i threw away my failed attempt at a letter
and instead ill send you a telepathic hug and kiss
and a picture of my smile
with a note attached, saying…
“hey you…
you did this.”

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